Novembre Quindici, 5: 38 AM

My head aches. It always does, after crying all night. Last night, I was writing here and the power went out. It’s not just us, but the whole neighborhood. I have nothing to do so I called up Lizzie to apologize because I thought she’s mad at me. It turned out that she wasn’t.

I don’t know what happened, but I bailed over the phone. She said that there’s so many people read my blog entries. I was clueless, really. Seriously, I thought Jerry was the first one who stumbled in my blogsite, but it turned out that it was Mark. I don’t know how he did it, but I’m impressed. I used to respect that guy, because one) he’s smart and intelligent and two)he’s talented. But not anymore. Why? Because he is a one-full hell of backstabber. He should’ve told me that he was reading my blog entries, and tell me “Regine, fuck you, why are you mentioning my name on your blog?” or “I don’t like what I’ve read, stop it and go to hell.” Considering the mean words, it would be still forgivable. But to spill it all to your friends, I don’t think I could forgive that. Anyway, who cares? I’m getting out of that damn school.

Lizzie apologized because she was doing the same, sometimes. It’s okay, because she repented. I was just sad that’s why I was crying. I was really curious who told Kerwyn about me getting mad at him. And Lizzie had the answer. She said Kerwyn had been reading my blog. I asked her who told Kerwyn about the blog, and she said Mark told them, because he’s the one who discovered it.

Oh my God. I just accused Jerry of telling people about it. I was so wrong. I’ll apologize to Jerry through email, later. I don’t want to confront them anymore. I’m tired.

Anyway, Lizzie said that she enjoyed reading my blog. I wished I asked her why, but I was so preoccupied with my emotional outburst that time. I just replied with a modest “thank you” and continued crying.

The thing is, I’m fussing out because I am completely clueless about what people say about me. I don’t know how to react because I don’t really know what those horrible people say

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