Novembre Diciotto, 3:40 PM

It’s the second day of the first semester. I just got home from school, and I was here at home around three in the afternoon. I was home early because Roa wasn’t around. Invited in a party, according to the mail he sent us yesterday.

My computer class was canceled, great, because, honestly speaking, I don’t need this, you know. I can repair our own unit, for goodness’ sake.

I tried my best waking up early today, and I was successful. I arrived in school ten times earlier than usual. I bumped into Jackie and she asked for my number. Sarina was already waiting outside CL1 and told me the bad news; you know, our computer class was dissolved. Damn it.

So we went together to the caf and just talked. I told her how I felt about others felt about me. You know, being the class’ official nerd stuff. I told her about the weird mail I received from Kerwyn last night. The mail said that he somebody told him that I’m, you know, mad at him. Honestly, no. I was just sad because I thought he didn’t like me anymore. He said he was sorry and I was about to write back when the phone rang. I answered it, since my mom was talking to a regular visitor of hers. It was Kerwyn. I told him to transfer to the other line so that we could talk privately. That’s it. We talked for whole two hours. I learned from him that Mark (the theatre dude) hates me. I wasn’t, you know, angry or anything, but I was sad because I’m not doing anything to him, except being weird.

The thing is, Mark’s not the only one who despises me of what I am. There’s Miguel, Tom and the rest of their friends. I was like “Hello. I’ve never did anything to them.” As far as I could remember, I never talked to any of them for the rest of the semester. Never, as in. Not even a word. Except for Mark, I guess, because he always butt in my business.

Then, Kerwyn spilled it all. According to him, during Ariane’s birthday, they asked Lizzie and him, if they werre only just being obligated to let me join their peer. That was the most offensive thing I’ve ever heard, during my stay in that hell of a school. Is being a freak a crime nowadays? Anyway, I pretended to shrug that bad feeling off, but no matter how I pretend, still, it bothers me. I didn’t even slept for the night, because I was thinking what did I do wrong.

I think, I should ignore them and move on with my own life. They are not any better than me, so I don’t care what they say. They barely know me, so why trust their criticism? Kerwyn also feels the same like I do, so I assured him that those people were just insecure and they backstab other people to so that they can tell themselves that they’re superior to other people.

Another thing, Mark questioned Lizzie about giving me the chocolate bars. Kerwyn told me that he was cooing over the fact that Lizzie gave me chocolate bars because she treats me as a friend. Uhm, or maybe, he wanted Lizzie’s chocolate bars all for himself.

I bid Kerwyn goodnight because it’s Kyle XY already. Darn it, I missed few episodes so I lost track of the story.

By the way, Kerwyn quoted, “Give a little love and it all comes back to you…” from the Coke commercial. I always believe in that, but now, I doubt if it’s true.

And I had a hard time sleeping because of what Kerwyn told me. I was thinking twice about confronting those perverts, but I ended up deciding not to, because if I do, it will only show that I stooped low into their level.

Sarina was adamant. She just told me how precious I am, and those people are just so narrow-minded to understand. My eyes almost filled with tears because of what she said. She reminds me of Jeni, actually.

We went to English class together. For the second time, we’re cursed with narrow-minded classmates like Radson and his little gang. However, I still enjoyed the class because we’re blessed by cool teacher this time.

I attended my Math class right after, and I was terrified to see my old professor. I never expected to pass that subject, but I did, unharmed and still sane. I wish I could manage to do it again. I ate lunch with Sarina (Lane was missing) and we went to World Literature class together. There, we found Lane sitting with Randolph. There were some familiar, but unfriendly faces in the room, and one of those was Jobelle. I never bothered to greet her because she hates me, since the beginning, just because I’m weird.

James the elf showed up. Not again. He discussed the guidelines, so nothing was new about that. He mentioned that there were some students that make his temples throb, and he was glaring at me (which I am guilty of course, for being not in my seat and strutting around the school, most of the time, durinng English 10 class). Obviously, it was me.

After that, we accompanied Lane to the gym and I went home. It’s an easy ride, I could say. I was home by aroung half past two in the afternoon.

And awhile ago, I was super pissed of with Benedict because he didn’t let me in to their house. So I went back to our house. I was about to write here when Ben’s mother’s assistant showed up in front of our gate, saying that Ben has tons of homework. Well, I would never agree of going back again, so I let her in, and I did Ben’s homeworks, right in front of the computer, while giving out testimonials in friendster.

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