Values : Looking beyond the Devil and the Deep Sea Dilemma

There are several times when we are confronted with reality: we do something which is in direct conflict with what should be done ideally. In other words, we very much know what is right, and yet, we do the wrong thing, just trying to compromise for that one moment. However, the precise problem is that we do it again and again.

There are times when our conscience tells that we are doing the wrong thing, and there is a big dilemma between the devil and the deep sea.

These are the exact times that we should focus on, and live a value-based life, where we do not compromise at all. In other words, we should forget the short-term gain in terms of our compromises, and yet, somehow manage to live a value-based life.

Examples abound. We often travel with our family in travels, distances beyond one thousand kilometers. On-line booking of rail tickets, has made it easy for us, and corruption has indeed been reduced. We should always search for value-based trasactions, rather than do the most simple thing, that millions do: "take care of the TTE" in the train. If we ourselves do this, what lessons do we give to our wife and young children or even children in their twenties? It would make them motivated to do the same, and look for short-cuts in whatever they do.

What are the alternatives? Split the travel and go by buses. For example, if one were to travel between say, Madurai (500 kilometeres from Chennai) and Hyderabad, and all the trains are totally full, one can still take a bus to Chennai, and board the Pinakani express at Chennai, with open tickets, upto Vijayawada, and then take another bus, to Hyderabad. Yes, it is laborious, it is tiring, but the value-based option has been exercised, and the family can still feel proud that it has done the right thing. Excellent connectivity between places, and even the special trains are superb alternatives for the value-based option.

Usage of plastics, giving donations to secure admission into the LKG class,or secure an engineering college admission or a medical college admission are all outright stupid, and valueless things. For example, if a student has not scored so well in his plus two examinations in the science group in the Tamil Nadu State Board examinations, with Mathematics, Physics, Chemistry and Computer Science as the main subjects,there are many options available. "Good Marks" in this exam means not securing one hundred in each of the subjects, since this is the benchmark for admission to the best engineering colleges.

The sky is the limit for value-based, and even better alternatives. For instance, if the child can be prepared to go through a special coaching for taking the All India Engineeing Entrance Examination (AIEEE), which is conducted by the CBSE, there is every chance that he or she will get a good State rank in this examination and find his or her way into the National Institute of Technology, Tiruchirapalli, which is reputed to be the best NIT in India, raned just after the IITs in the best engineering college pecking order.

Or, if the child is good in extra-curricular activities, parents should encourage the child to go in for off-beat options like a degree in Visual Communication (tbe best course in India is available at the Loyola College, Chennai, which pioneered this course in India), computer science,and even humanities like economics. More often than not, lack of awareness is one cause of corruption in higer education.

We do not think of alternatives. We look for "here and now" solutions. This is dangerous for our own well-being and of course, the society as well.

Every sitation has a value-based alternative, provided we try. For instance, let us say, we have troublesome neighbours. We can try to reason out with them, try to make them understand what can be done ideally, but if some undesirable behaviors are still exhibited, we should change our location of rented house, and move out. This is the best of value-based solutions. Instead, if we were to pick up quarrel with them for every small thing, we would only be adding misery to our lives.

Value-based living does not necessarily mean going to all the temples so religiously, and doing all the things that need to be done, to make God forgive all our sins. If we can avoid sinning in the very first place, we would have done ourselves and our families,a world of good.

Hence, the trick is to find out answers to the folloing questions:-

a) Given a particular situation, what should I do? The answer will depend on the situation, but the start should be with the most simplest, but most profound in terms of harm to the society. (use of jute, for example, in place of plastics while shopping)

b) What are the best alternatives, given the realities of life, including certain things such as savings, pressure on limited resources to achieve something, and so on? For example, if our children are well-placed in foreign countries, the best value-based option is to go in for the old-age homes, where we are taken care for a lifetime. It would be impossible and even stupid to expect our sons or daughters to take care of us, wherever they are, for a living. In fact, this is exactly what will happen with educated manpower, with an excellent English-medium background. They will find jobs so easily in countries like China, Malaysia, Indonesia,Australia and Japan, in the years to come. This is bound to happen, and let us all be very pragmatic about it.

c) How can I prepare myself for the future, with all its uncertainities,and yet be value-based? This is eminently possible, provided we know what to do. For instance, many old people in their sixties and seventies, who are otherwise hale and healthy, without any complaint of diabetes, or blood-pressure, and so on, wisely go in for ayurvedic treatment, which is both preventive, and also curative. This is very effective, provided we go to the best doctors. And this is much cheapter than the so-called allopathic treatment, which is very costly.

d) If one does not have the resources, what can one do? Simple. Do one's best, and endure the suffering, to the maximum extent possible. This is exactly what many hundreds of poor people do, and they offer us several lessons in life, provided we care to learn from them.

Of course, there are several other questions, and answers, but the most important ones are outlined above. Value-based living is all that we can do, to set an example, to our own families to all around us. Hundreds of thousands of such people are already doing great work, and it is time, we followed them, in our own way, throughout our lives.

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