Taking life as it comes

Life for anyone is a combination of several good experiences and a few bad experiences. For the illiterate, the very poor and the disadvantaged, the bad experiences often outweigh the good ones. However for most of us -- the well-read, educated people, it is mostly the good that is applicable. Yet, we become very sad, feel miserable and sometimes totally dejected if we face the bad experiences.

Sometimes the behaviour of someone for whom we have the maximum love and affection hurts us no end. At other times, some experiences in our offical life pull us down and it affects our personal life as well. Many times, even unconsciously, we ventilate all our anger on the most innocent of people who matter most in our lives -- our life-partners.

While it is indeed true that we need to plan our lives, we should also be prepared to take on the challenge of the unknown,more so, when such experiences are not so pleasant.

How can we do this? One best solution is to prepare ourselves for the unknown both financially and psychologically. For example, it is now very wise to invest in real estate, rather than keep it in the PF account. It is wise to earn money through every means possible -- particularly if one has some special talent like photography -- rather than waste time.

Hence, if we think a little, it becomes obvious that we are can indeed do something with our circumstances, no matter how difficult they are. Likewise, it is futile to blame fate or some circumstance that is seemingly beyond our control. All we need to do is to make an accurate assessment of our life position at some point in time. For instance, I have advised several people who work in organizations other than my own, to quit jobs that were dead-end in nature and, where they were doing more of the same, day in and day out. It helped them to come out of the rut, and they are now so happy in their jobs, as they have joined organizations that are sincere in helping grow and develop.

Hence, whatever we our circumstances, we should attempt to seek that elusive happiness in whatever ways we can. This can happen through sharing our joys or sorrows with some really good and trustful friends -- a rare breed indeed in today's society -- or in searching for opportunities to exhibit our talent -- be it singing, or dancing or writing or whatever. Doing us -- mostly outside the scope of our regular jobs in formal organizations -- will enable us to seek happiness.

Regarding the bad experiences, it is wise to learn from experience and keep off relationships that we find, cannot florish in the normal course of our lives. If it is concerned with business, it is wise to find out why we are not getting new customers, or whether our business model is itself at fault. It does pay to do a perfect analysis of our situation at any point in time.

We should also perhaps accept certain realities. For example, if we expect too personalised relationships with some people, including relatives, it is wise to forget this in most cases. For, the bitter truth is that there is commercialisation of relationships -- with very very rare exceptions -- in almost every relationship. So, if we accept this reality, there is no sadness. Similarly, if we accept that we need additional money at every stage of our lives in the future, we will be motivated to save money, by minimising our expenses, to the maximum extent possible.

Based on my own experience, it does pay to ask these following questions:-

a) How can I come out of this sadness, that is now in me? What best can I do now, here and now? Does it involve someone else, and if yes, how can we deal with him/her?
b) How can I maximise my happiness, through some natural talent, that comes to me, so naturally and where I do not need to put in special effort?
c) How can I make others happy, more so, those who do not have the advantages I have -- a good job, a good deal of job security, a happy family and such other things? Can I do something for them -- for example, conducting a special class in English, for some plus two children?

Answers to such questions can help us to face life as it comes.

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