me as an ex-emo

it was a time in my life then that i cant understand what was going on...
everything seems it was all being screwed up...
until now i have these scars from my cuttings then...
some made fun of me..
even my siblings get mad at me wondering what wad going on woth my mind doing such things...
they cant understand me...
so do i?...

it all started when i my father died 3 years ago...

i unknowingly forgot sbout my studies trying to hide my pain with my friends... i dont consider them as bad influence.. it was only me who's got a problem...there are times that i was in the middle of the class or an occation very happy... and then end up crying...

that was a year ago...

im now in the city studying in a university..

in the city...my eyes are then awaken with lifes true reality..

then these questions start sprouting...

why would i burry myself with these catastrophy when i was more priveledged with my loving family still with me?

why would i waste my life when i know someone is breathing mechanically with hospital apparatus and his family hoping and praying that he'll open his eyes to spend a liitle more time with them?

why would i sobber when i can still do something to help other people change through this...

so now i say...

"suicide? think again..."

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